Up for grabs…

Remember, in a few posts back, my mention of a spur of the moment, part-time job application I filled out. It was for that job I had about 3 years ago doing hearing screenings on newborns. I talked to the coordinator earlier today. Her needs and my availability likely won’t mesh for this position unfortunately.

She was very nice, but was really looking for someone to handle two days during the week. One of her employees is pregnant and I think she is running up against the fact that this person may not return, as well as trying to find someone to cover vacations if possible. I wanted weekends, so unless she thought I was just an amazing person during our phone conversation, and can convince her current employees to shift their own schedules to accommodate moi, I doubt that this will go forward.

She was very nice to speak with, and also leads the program at a large medical center to the north, near Seattle. That center, like the one I left a few years ago, houses a Level III NICU which means they likely also have an incredibly busy OB department and deliver lots of babies. We chatted for a bit and I shared that I had worked the second shift during my time with the company. She chuckled a bit at that and mentioned that the hospital she is recruiting for only has one shift per day, and that their average is about 8 babies needing screenings on that shift. Then it was my turn to laugh. Eight babies was the average for my previous 4-hour long second shift. What a luxury to have more time, as well as not have the NICU babies as well.

So, we ended our conversation on a pleasant note with my assurance that I was still interested if her needs changed. I have to admit that the slower pace and the proximity to my home was exciting, but I take the viewpoint that things work out in the way that they should.

My complaint about this company is that they don’t specify exactly what days/hours they are looking for in their ads. It would sure be easier for everyone if they did so I think that I will sit on things for a bit, then perhaps consider another application for one of the positions where I was located before.

Speed Kills

One of my favorite doctor bloggers posted a poem today about the presentation of symptoms in healthy youngish individuals who might be using a group of drugs folks of my generation referred to as ‘uppers.’ First, I have to ask, is that term still a thing, or has it been replaced by a more colorful, or even cryptic description.

This post sparked a memory, and because I have newly re-found my voice for however long it lasts in this realm, I am inspired to full disclosure on an experience from my younger days.

It was the early 1980’s, probably the summer of 1981. I was 20-years-old with an upcoming 21st birthday in September. I was living alone after being tossed out of my live-in boyfriends shared home. He wanted the relationship to be over, I didn’t, and wasn’t willing to make the break at first so while literally not tossed out, at the time that’s what it felt like. It was the right move in the end.

A mutual female friend of the ex and myself got tickets to a concert in Portland. I know for sure Blue Oyster Cult was one of the bands, and I think perhaps Rush was the other. It was an outdoor concert, held in some uncovered bowl-like stadium on the outskirts of the city. Honestly I’m not even sure how close to Portland we really were. When she asked me to go along, she mentioned that her brother, and my ex, were the other two with tickets. I easily convinced myself that the presence of the ex wouldn’t be an issue. The naivete of the young…

I do remember thinking it odd that both the ex and the brother were rounding out the group, until I realized that the brother was well known for his ability to supply pot and the accompanying knowledge that the ex (a huge reason he WAS my ex) had decided that being high most of the time was the best way to live. My claim to using drugs at that point was one batch of pot brownies consumed on a trip to the coast a few years prior, and two attempts to smoke pot that resulted in truly laughable episodes of coughing so hard that I peed my pants. I found it better to stick with the occasional contraband bottle of Annie Green Springs or Boone’s Farm wine because remember, I wasn’t really legal yet.

The friend was also not into getting high, so – again being naive – I thought I would just ignore the two stoners and have fun. We’ll leave the awkwardness I felt just being around the ex again out of this post. I realized rather quickly that, even in his drug induced haze, it was difficult to be around him. So I did what any 20-year-old female would do in that situation. I set out prove just how much his presence didn’t bother me. Yeah, stupidity was in abundance.

Long story short, and why I was inspired to write today, was that we arrived at the stadium, found our solid concrete seats in the last row of the farthest right hand corner facing the stage, full-on 80+ degree sun beating down us, two idiots already high, and no plans (because who knew then) to stay hydrated, or have sunscreen. Of course, beer was an option and we indulged in that because we actually had someone over 21 to buy it for us. I wonder now if that was part of the motivation to bring the dealer brother along. At some point early in, likely after a beer run or two, the brother pulls a bottle or a baggie or something from his pocket and casually mentions to our group, “we should take these now so we can stay awake…” and no, that’s not really a direct quote, but something along those lines came out of his mouth and I found myself looking at a few small white pills.

Here’s stupidity point number 2, or maybe 5, or maybe even 13, I lost count by the time the day was over. My brain probably registered some sort of recognition that this substance was speed, but there sat my stoner ex-boyfriend and even though I wasn’t indulging in his favorite drug of choice, we had that little issue of showing him that I could hold my own. So I took one of the pills.

I don’t really remember the rest of the day. By the time the concert was over at 6pm, or 8pm…I was starving, because one random hot dog didn’t do much to fill me up. I was severely sunburned and so very likely dehydrated. The buzz from the beers I did have had long earlier worn off, but I wasn’t tired. Ten hours after taking that pill I was wide awake. So we piled in the car, the wasted duo in the back seat, and my friend driving. It was about an hour into our drive home when I realized my palms were sweating, and itching and I was feeling my heart beating, as in consciously aware of my heart beating. Then I started getting really paranoid. I just knew that my friend was going to fall asleep at the wheel and I was going to die and that the entire day definitely hadn’t been worth an ending like that. I have no idea if these reactions had anything to do with that pill, and I honestly don’t know if that pill was methamphetamine. It was assumptive on my part, but seems likely.

While not everything since then in my world has turned out perfect, and I definitely haven’t made the best choices, I hope that I really am no longer that naive, or that I exhibit levels of stupidity like I did that day.

Share Your World 2016 Week 4

Share Your World Week 4

What one thing are you really glad you did yesterday? Watched the new X-Files, episode 2. They are leaving no one out of the conspiracy. I want to see Donald Trump featured as an alien hybrid poised to conquer the world. It might help to explain some things about him.

Are you generally focused on today or tomorrow? I am a tomorrow person. I can be obsessive about what is to come, am I ready, what do I need to plan for – running scenarios over and over in my head. I admit I drive myself nuts, but I think that I’ve always been like this – looking to the future and the what if question.

Would you want to have a guardian angel/mentor? What would they tell you right now? Wow, these are two widely divergent entities. Do I want divine intervention and guidance or do I want the everyday normal person who will lend advice and criticism if needed. I have to go with the mentor, as anything angelic isn’t really a part of who I am. Actually, since I would likely be the older one in the relationship I think it would be great TO BE the mentor. If I was fortunate to find and older, wiser person to guide me they most likely would say, “Off your ass get now. Destiny you make. Happen now, wait never.”


Would you rather live in a cave house or a dome house made out of glass? Well, as I’m not much of an exhibitionist and I would rather not take the chance that someone wandering by my dome might notice that I was sitting on the toilet, I have to go with the cave. It’s said that cave homes regulate their temperatures very well so that’s a plus. I won’t be sleeping on any rock ledges though, nor will I take up wearing animal skins.


Bonus question:  What are you grateful for from last week, and what are you looking forward to in the week coming up? I always sort of dread this question each week. I’m sure I must have been grateful for something, even if it was minor, I just usually can’t remember what or where the gratitude focused on. So I have no answer for the first part. As to looking forward to the rest of the week, I think it must be that there will be less people around for a few days as one has work related plans and the other will be drinking beer far away from home.

More Power

Second post today, I know…sorry, but I encountered a piece of technology today that really works and that I was impressed with. That’s saying a lot for me.

I was prepping food for tonight’s dinner, and tomorrow as well, right around 12:30. Just as my gravy was beginning to thicken nicely for the vegetarian Shepherds Pie tonight – pfft – no power. We aren’t stormy here so I figured it either had to be a car into a pole or something was going on maintenance wise at a sub-station.

The last time our power went out I discovered that our power provider had added a nifty app where you could report outages and even see just how big the outage was. Since the power was out, that meant the wifi was out as well, so after waiting an inordinate length of time for my carriers wifi to find itself on my phone, and actually decide it was going to stay connected (we have the worst coverage in the world here) I signed in to our account, reported my outage and up popped the map showing that I was definitely not alone. Over 2700 were without power by the report and we were all contained in a bright red ‘outage area’ map. This nifty little app gives you the time the power went out, an estimate of return time, status reports and even a cause, if the crews have been able to figure that part out. It even told me that I got my power back before some folks to the east who are still sitting in the red.

I really hope you aren’t laughing hysterically at this post. I’m sure most of you that routinely use apps on your phone find this all silly. I seriously do not have apps running on my phone. I use my phone to talk, text, and maybe email if I have to send something and I’m away from my computer. So when I do put one on the phone, and it works well, that’s a big deal to me.

Alright, back to your day. I have a dinner to finish.

What Does Your Wardrobe Say About You?

I’ve thought for a few days about sharing this little development, or not, on the blog. However, the development ties in conveniently with another of those ‘articles I found in the newspaper and wanted to comment on’ situations. Rest assured, if you are on the edge of panic anticipating another major gender lesson…well…try not to run away in terror. There likely will be some talk on this subject, because – yes, but maybe I can keep it in check.

On the same day the Dear Abby question surfaced, there was also an article in the business section of the paper called “The Right Look For The Job.” No issue there, but what caught my eye was the sub-heading:

“Older job candidates should give their wardrobe a fresh update before the interview”

I thought for a moment, and wondered if the author was suggesting that we older individuals aren’t very trendy, or perhaps that we live in wrinkled, torn, haphazardly tossed together outfits. I was even less impressed as I began to read the article itself.

“You don’t have to wear a Fred Flintstone frock to a job interview to come across as ancient, behind the times and technologically out of vogue.”

The put-downs continued, but I quickly realized (you’d think the distinguished older gentleman pictured would have clued me in) that the article was mostly geared toward men and the wearing of appropriate suits. It wasn’t until I glanced at the last few paragraphs and saw that women were mentioned in relation to the “complicated and controversial” issue of panty hose, and how they can date you, that my interest was renewed. I read on, taking careful note of the advice that I should not wear boxy blazers or a baggy blouse to “try to disguise the belly weight that tends to come with middle age.” Finally, I was admonished to try not to dress too young in a vain attempt to look “youthful.”

“Perhaps women need to worry more than men about the age-appropriateness of their attire…”

…because as a 56-year-old woman interviewing for a substantial higher level position, I am going to be sure to pull out my cut-off jeans and halter top from 1978 and wear that to the interview. I am so impressed when sexism and ageism is combined to put me in my place.

At the time that I read this article I just as quickly dismissed it, almost as quickly as I was dismissing the fashion stylists who are quoted above.

However, just a few days ago, my wardrobe came to mind. You know that I watch the granddaughters. Some days I wear athletic style yoga pants and a t-shirt, other days my normal jeans. I spend my days going up and down stairs, doing messy art projects, rolling on the floor, crawling under the bed, cooking with a 3 1/2-year-old, and now with the addition of Miss C, wiping baby puke and increasingly copious amounts of spittle off of my shoulder, lap and sometimes even my shoe.

I have also been thinking a lot about the fact that, in the future, as these girls get older, and my role with them is less and less, I may need/want to look for a job. In light of my marital issues, those thoughts have been turning even more toward the category of necessity. As I have not worked in over three years, I’ve been exploring some options for paid part-time work so that, if needed, I will have at least one current job to list on a resume.

You may remember, about the time that Miss G was born, that I was working for a company that provided hearing screenings for newborn babies prior to discharge from the hospital. On occasion, over these many years, I have checked the listings for this same position. It is always listed, likely because it is ONLY part-time, the wages are not livable for a single person, and there are definitely no benefits involved. I always enjoyed the work but left due to the drive-versus gas money-versus little pay-dilemma. Honestly, I really sort of regretted my decision as soon as I resigned.

Recently a spur of the moment decision to check the job listing again led me to find the position still posted at the original hospital site, but now also posted for the hospital that is literally 2 minutes from my home.

I touched up my resume and applied. I specified that any weekend shift would be fine, with the ability to fill in on some weekday shifts if needed. After I hit submit, I realized just how much I have needed to pursue this path. I need to have the opportunity to speak with adults in between the days that I converse in preschool speak and baby talk. I need to have my own income, even if I couldn’t live on it. I need to have a place to be on these long weekends when I would rather be anywhere but here. I need to plan ahead for the real possibility that I may need some of that sexist wardrobe advice if working truly does become a necessity in the future.

I need to see if, and where, this might take me. I know the job. It was fun, allowed for independent work and educational interaction, both of which I love. So, we’ll see what happens and I’ll let you know. In the mean time I don’t plan to rush out and buy any inappropriate beige panty hose. Nor do I even own a boxy blazer or baggy blouse. My middle-aged belly will be evident under my semi-tailored shirt and black pants. And, even though technicians employed in this position wear traditional hospital scrubs, I will do everything that I can not to look ancient or out of vogue if I am asked to interview.

All quotes taken from the CareerBuilder section of The News Tribune dated January 17, 2016 and found within the this article: Klingensmith, D. “The Right Look For the Job”. CTW Features.

Themes and colors and choices

I would love some feedback if anyone is inclined. I picked this theme when I changed up the blog the last time because it is clean and streamlined. It took me a while to get used to the barrenness of this no-sidebar look without blog lists, archives, other pages, and the like. I figured that most of you who have been around WordPress would know that the little menu icon would get you to those other places.

I am cheap, I admit it, and have not switched over to any sort of pay-for-service plan offered by WordPress. I just don’t need it. So, this free theme is one that doesn’t allow for a lot of customization. I basically get two default color schemes with the ability to pick hues and concentrations of those two choices. The choices: blue or pink.

Isn’t that ironic when you have a blogger who takes such issue with stereotypical signs of gender, such as assigned male or female colors… 

Anyway, you the reader have been enjoying the blue default color palette since I switched over months ago. I have experimented with darkening the background color a bit from the stark white, but (and one of the reasons I am asking for opinions) is that my highlighted, links then seem to get lost and blend into the slightly colored background. Although that could easily be my eyesight failing as well..

Last night I played and today I switched over to the pink default color. Now the links are highlighted in a deep hue and the background is what I would refer to as dusty rose.

Honestly I prefer the blues but I wonder if anyone had a difficult time seeing the highlighted links when I was using that blue color scheme? I think the contrast is pretty obvious now, but I also want something that is easy on the eyes and readable.

Here’s yesterday’s post linked so you can see what I mean.

Anyone want to weigh in with an opinion?